Friday, July 12, 2013

Gender, Literature, Society in me and my friends' perspectives (Maria and Yurica - Christian University of Indonesia)

Maria Kristina Pingkan – 1021150015
Yurica – 1021150004

Gender in Literature and Society

            Gender is characteristics and social differences that distinguish between masculinity and femininity, male and female, men and women. Thus, gender tends to roles and social systems while sex is more on biological things. Gender has social expectations such as woman usually demanded to nurturing while men supposed to be a leader.
There is a concept of gender that influences our daily lives. First of all concepts of women, in society, women have three roles which are as daughters, wives and mothers. So, women have boundaries to men in patriarchy system. As daughters they have their father names. As wives their responsibilities to obey their husbands and be passive in taking families decisions because they have their husbands’ last name. That is why wives being oppressed in marital lives. Then, as mothers they have to take care of their family members. Therefore, during their life, they have no own life, because they have to dedicate they lives to men. Those are called femininity.
In society, men also have three roles, such as son, husbands, and fathers. As son, they are educated to be a leader, strong, independent, brave, bold, and not soft and they are forbid to cry, because usually cry is for girls, and being a son is also a pride of their family. As husbands, they must be taking control of their family, to protect them and make decisions to their families. As fathers they tend to be a role models for their sons and to be a shelter to their families. They also have to work, to provide their family. Those called masculinity.
These concepts has rooted in our daily lives, especially for some cultures having strict rules about this. In some of Indonesian cultures’ perspectives, marriage life tends to patriarchy systems indicating women should be the second class while men are the first class in their positions. It is a part of social-construct still occurs in small villages. For example, in a marriage, a woman should be “perfect” or “ideal” for man. She is demanded to be patient and soft, can cook and put make up. She has to be “flawless” for society means that she should be still virgin before marriage and come from a good family if she will married a man from higher class than him. On the other hand, for man, the society never asked for his “virginity” because it can be directly seen and known. Well, this society is really unfair because it is not too important for a man to be “flawless” too as long as he has a good job and earns much money (in some cultures, man can “buy” his chosen woman with a large amount)
 However, in big cities such as Jakarta, it is not really matter anymore because both men and women  should be active and independent to earn money. Working is a must and there is no gender distinction to have a job, excluding some jobs needing more energy and should be done by men. Even though there is difference in salary for men and women, a chance to get job still same according to personal’s test result, competencies , and abilities of the worker.
Nowadays, these images are not really suitable with the fact, because men should be masculine and women should be feminine. However, these situations often are turned over. From example, some men are feminine and some women are masculine. In this case, some men do woman’s works and they are not ashamed to do it. They also have women’s characters, such as, they care to their body, their face, and they can nurture, and do the house chores. On the other hand, some women can be independent, have career, be a leader, can do men’s works, such as engineering, wrestling, repair electronic stuff, and be a chauffeur.
 Literature leads us to understand the issues of gender, then we can related the issues in real life because literature talks about human kinds and values. Literature helps to spread gender issues to the world and also influence either women or men about the equality for woman right. Through literature, women can voice what they feel and have, such as oppression, discrimination and other unfair treatment as the effects of society demand in patriarchal systems. As seen in the God of Small Things where Roy brings some facts about Indian women that strive and stay in those “illogical” rules by religion and culture. This novel can help world understand Indian women’s suffering and drive (or perhaps continue?) women’s movement in India. This struggle will never stop until they have their rights as a human. Thus, literature is a window for a person and world to see the reality and then involved to do something for a better future.
In my opinion (Yurica) the issues related to gender has changed because between male and female everything they both have or do must be balance, for the example in the house, the male should help do the house chores because they lives together and even if they both work, but in the house they must be work together to keep the balance in the house. Then, the identity of male and female is also changed, now some male are more ‘feminin’ than female, even they are more keep their looks.
I am personally (Maria) do not really agree with what society forms about gender although I have to follow this system whether I like it or not. As a woman, I prefer to do the best in my life not for being a “good” future wife or mom but more on being a good woman for myself. If I can cook it is all for myself and people I love not because it is my duty. If I can dress up or put make up on my face it is not because I have to be beautiful for a man, but it is more because I want it for myself. I want myself to be independent and responsible. I do not want society to limit my love for my future family because taking care of my family and obey my (future) husband, for me, should be done as an expression of love not a burden. I can do those things with all my heart but no one can force me to be what they want (my future husband, mother in law, etc) If I love my family, I will do anything for them but it does not mean I am their assistant, slave, or chef.
Therefore, this course has strengthened my beliefs of being a “tough” woman related to gender, race, and identity. Honestly, it is hard to against this system but it must. In my opinion, women should be treated equally by society because women give birth and educate their children. Furthermore, woman in marriage has a role as a “pillar” that supports her husband in every aspect of life, such as in religious and work life. It all comes from women, as a quote says that behind a success man, there is a success woman either she is a mother, wife or perhaps a sister. It is not always about marriage, but for a women it is about being good, better, and the best for ourselves from the first.


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